What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife.
– Rodney Dangerfield
Related Quotes:
- My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. – Rodney Dangerfield
- I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn’t a professional, the knife had ????er on it. – Rodney Dangerfield
- Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy’s pocket on an airplane and made a run for it. – Rodney Dangerfield
- I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody’s fingers. – Rodney Dangerfield
- When I was kidnapped as a child my parents sent a letter to the hijackers me Pay 5,000 dollars or your back – Rodney Dangerfield
- I’m not a hypochondriac, but my gynaecologist firmly believes I am. – Rodney Dangerfield
- You gotta look out for number one, but don’t step in number two! – Rodney Dangerfield
- They put me in a holding cell with a black kid and a white kid and a Chinese kid. We’re the United Nations of juvenile delinquents. – Sherman Alexie
- Well, I will wear the bees, like Damon and Pythagoras -“ ho, a mere sixty thousand bees in the cabin don’t signify, much. – Patrick OBrian
- One can no more approach people without love than one can approach bees without care. Such is the quality of bees… – Leo Tolstoy
- Love is for the birds.Honey is for the bees.And you, my special one.Are the only one for me. – Anthony T Hincks
- Though everyone who mattered to him told him to walk away, though Lindsey herself told him to walk away, he was still here. And she was still glad. – Jamie Farrell
- A salary is, to a man’s employer, what his wife’s ?????? is to his wife: a tool used to (1) reward; and (2) control him. – Mokokoma Mokhonoana
- When the world becomes peaceful for the birds, the birds will sing a harmonious chorale – Ernest Agyemang Yeboah
- I loved this place when I was a kid. I still love it, but when I was a kid I’d take the bus down here and spend all day long reading in this room. – Caitln R Kiernan
- A -˜white’ kid that asks too many questions is called *curious.* A -˜black’ kid that asks too many questions is called *forward.* – Mokokoma Mokhonoana
- Democracy without respect for individual rights sucks. It’s just ganging up against the weird kid, and I’m always the weird kid. – Penn Jillette
- The worst thing a kid can say about homework is that it is too hard. The worst thing a kid can say about a game is it’s too easy. – Henry Jenkins
- This book is dedicated to all the students I’ve known over the years who’ve taught me humility and what it means to really be a kid. – Dr Kid Brain
- A kid of your age-”any kid-”could get hold of matches if she wanted to, burn up the house or whatever. But not many do. Why would they want to? – Stephen King
- Kids are flat-out freaking hilarious if you are paying attention. Not just my kid, but every kid. – Dan Alatorre
- She’d found him. She’d helped him. She’d saved him. He was hers. And they’d taken him away, ripped him from her arms, literally. – Laura Kaye
- You can’t really teach a kid anything: you can only show him the way and motivate him to learn it himself. – Dave Cullen
- There is one thing more exasperating than a wife who can cook and won’t, and that’s a wife who can’t cook and will. – Robert Frost
- We must be more and more to each other, my dear wife.’ -Charles Darwin to wife Emma upon loss of daughter Annie – Deborah Heiligman
- I wouldn’t be a good wife, but I would be a wife in a way that was cinematically compelling. – Gabby Bess
- I have a theory that while a man might not always get the wife he wants or needs, he always gets the wife he deserves. – Marlon James
- A righteous wife is a respectful wife. – Habeeb Akande
- The better the wife,the happier the man.The happier the man,the happier the wife. – Matshona Dhliwayo
- Water is taught by thirst;Land, by the oceans passed;Transport, by throe;Peace, by its battles told;Love, by memorial mould;Birds, by the snow. – Emily inson
- A friend told me that one day he and I would be rich and famous. I told him that I’d trade my half of the fame, for his half of the money. – Quentin R Bufogle
- Saul’s vitals were not human, but familiar:he never told me he was from another world:I never told him I was from his future. – Joe Haldeman
- Before marriage man prays that god give him a wife, after marriage he prays that god save him from her. – Bangambiki Habyarimana
- My mission is not to make him happy and bear his children and be his wife. My mission is to kill him. – Amy Engel
- I know what you want, darlin’. You go on and ask me nicely and you might just get it. – Eve Dangerfield
- So, daddy, huh?C’mon Blue-Eyes, don’t be like that. You kept screaming -˜more’ and it was the dirtiest thing I could think of. – Eve Dangerfield
- He’s more how Satan would look if he needed to seduce you into drowning a baby. – Eve Dangerfield
- You’d be impatient and that’s understandable, but if you were making too much noise, I’d find something better for that big sweet mouth to do. – Eve Dangerfield
- You want to give him the book of his own life, the book that will locate him, parent him, arm him for the changes. – Michael Cunningham
- It hurts so bad that I cannot save him, protect him, keep him out of harm’s way, shield him from pain. What good are fathers if not for these things? – Thomas Lynch