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When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he's doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911.

When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he’s doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911.
– Erma Bombeck

Related Quotes:

  1. Every time a stupid politician says something stupid, you don’t have to reply to him, because it is nonsense to shoo every barking dog away! – Mehmet Murat ildan
  2. Don’t worry about who doesn’t like you, who has more, or who’s doing what. – Erma Bombeck
  3. A friend doesn’t go on a diet because you are fat. – Erma Bombeck
  4. It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else. – Erma Bombeck
  5. Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery. – Erma Bombeck
  6. All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them. – Erma Bombeck
  7. I have seen my kid struggle into the kitchen in the morning with outfits that need only one accessory: an empty gin bottle. – Erma Bombeck
  8. If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. – Erma Bombeck
  9. Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone? – Erma Bombeck
  10. Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. – Erma Bombeck
  11. One never realizes how different a husband and wife can be until they begin to pack for a trip. – Erma Bombeck
  12. Housework, if you do it right, will kill you. – Erma Bombeck – Lynn Kellan
  13. It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows – Erma Bombeck
  14. Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart. – Erma Bombeck
  15. The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one. – Erma Bombeck
  16. Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence. – Erma Bombeck
  17. I come from a home where gravy is a beverage. – Erma Bombeck
  18. Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children. – Erma Bombeck
  19. There was a time when the one singular thing that held a marriage together was the threat of getting the kids. – Erma Bombeck
  20. Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving. – Erma Bombeck
  21. Just because you help others doesn’t mean you never need help yourself. Doctors can catch colds. Lawyers can be sued. Police officers can call 911. – Sarah Jakes
  22. You know you’re having a bad week when you call 911, the paramedics come to your house, and one of them notices you’ve rearranged your furniture. – Cherie Kephart
  23. It is my expectation that if I call 911 for the police that I will be blatantly harassed. – Steven Magee
  24. Intellectual controversies tend to be like dog fights without the teeth, in which the barking not the biting does the damage. – Luis Fernando Verissimo
  25. Chewing and barking do not make you a dog, you need the patience. – MF Moonzajer
  26. Be wary of the man who does not offer water, charges too much for water, asks for too much water, and the one who makes water his business. – Suzy Kassem
  27. Dad instantly set out his stall:he wanted a big dog, a ‘man dog’,a dog that if it was human would enjoy a pint and stare at the barmaid’s arse – Alan Carr
  28. The Church says: the body is a sin.Science says: the body is a machine.Advertising says: The body is a business.The Body says: I am a fiesta. – Eduardo Galeano
  29. I must go down to the sea again, for the call of the running tide, is a wild call and a clear call, that cannot be denied! – John Masefield
  30. Doing better is creativity,doing faster is creativity,doing smarter is creativity,doing right is creativity.doing Exclusive is creating identity. – Mohit Manke
  31. Time is running faster than watch.Life is running faster than Time.We are running faster than Life.In this race, relationships are being left behind – Pankaj Gupta
  32. Time is running faster than watch.Life is running faster than Time.We are running faster than Life.In this race, relations are being left behind – Pankaj Gupta
  33. [On doors of opportunity] If that door doesnt open, Dont worry. It was probably best you got locked out than be locked in. Move on the next door. – Janna Cachola
  34. Doing nothing can be as rewarding as doing something. And doing very little can be as productive, in a creative sense, as doing a lot. – Fennel Hudson
  35. What if you spent some alone time every morning? Call it prayer. Call it planning. Call it centering. I call it a powerful way to begin the day. – Steve Goodier
  36. When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I reasoned as a child, but when I became a man, I put away childish things. – Holy Bible
  37. To truly invest your time into doing what you were born to do, you should be running away from jobs not running to jobs. – Sunday Adelaja
  38. When Chuck Norris calls 911 it’s to ask if everything is ok. – Oliver Oliver Reed
  39. Meditation is doing what you are doing – whether you are doing formal meditation or child care. – Norman Fischer
  40. Doing better is creativity, doing faster is creativity, doing smarter is creativity, doing right is creativity. – Amit Kalantri

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